It's now or never!

I realize that its been a while since I posted last. As long as I give a monthly update, that has to count for something, right?

The main purpose of today's blog is to get out something that slapped me in the face this morning. During the past 8 months, there have been times when I've looked myself in the mirror and thought what the hell have you done to yourself?! Everytime this happend, I did not look happy. I know since I've started my job I have become less active with exercise... and my eating has suffered... suffered is putting it nicely... Basically, I have been eating whatever...whenever I want it.... There have been times I've tried to kid myself and not eat certain things... but, then I most definitely made up for it in bulk later on. I would kid around with family and friends saying that I am on a Ben and Jerry diet.. but in reality that was exactly what was happening... I can eat a whole pint of Ben and Jerry and not think twice.... but, think... man that was good... I want more! I have been trying to cut it off and I was successful since I visited AP and Momma C when school started. Then, this past sunday I went to walmart walked by the B&J and saw my favorite flavor "Imagine Whirled Peace" and saw that people were buying it up... I thought "what the hell?!?!?!!? That is MY flavor!!!" and I bought two pints.... needless to say that evening I enjoyed both PINTS :( Yes, I know..... NO MORE!

I have stayed away from the scale since Vegas... too scared to look. I told my mom last night that I need to do something... My eating is out of control. Tarleton sent out an email a couple weeks ago saying that they are starting a Weight Watchers @ Work program and I got one on Monday saying that the first information/registration meeting started today (weds) at 11am. I sent mom and email jokeningly "should I do this?" She replied You should P! What do you gotta lose? You got all the tools of the trade for this! You GO GIRL! :)" I do already have the majority of the supplies to do weight watchers. I tried to do it solo in June this summer. The big issue I had with going to the actual meetings is the cost.. The cost at tarleton is $186.00 for 17 weeks. Mom full well knows I am not in a good place money wise... and she still told me to go for it. I blown hundreds of dollars a few years ago in weight watchers... yet, she still said "What do you have to lose?"

This morning, I stepped on the scale to see what damage is.... it turns out I have gained 45 pounds since I've started this job at Tarleton... I worked too damn hard to lose the weight I did in the past... I'll be damned if I am going to let this job turn me into that person I once was in college where I was creeping towards 300lbs... tight size 24 jeans.... It's not going to happen! If things keep going the way they are in 6-8 more months, I will be there and it scares the hell out of me...

So, I joined WW today... I didnt have $186 to spend... but, I did it!

The first meeting starts next Wednesday!!!! So, I am going to get some things out of my system and give it a fresh start on Monday!

Wish me Luck!!!
~ T